after an hour convo with senor maas, a quick yet insightful chat with mariana, and an hour's worth of rereading blog entries from the past year complete with nostalgic (and not so nostalgic) montage, i have come to a realization...

my goal for this year was to "trim the fat", in which i would cleanse myself of all toxic relationships, and thats exactly what i did. as difficult as it was i was able to let go of people in my life that at one point made me happy and fulfilled me in so many ways because i realized that they no longer played that role in my life and had in fact become more of a burden than a blessing. they changed, i changed, and the changes just made us no longer compatible.

not only did i cleanse myself of those toxic relationships, but i also strengthened the ones that still fulfill me and created new ones that are fulfilling me in completely new ways. ive finally learned to NOT be ashamed of how i feel and how people affect me and to allow myself to be...well myself. ive finally learned how to be truthful not only with myself, but with others around me even though it may make me vulnerable and seem weak. im finally walking the talk ive been talking for oh so long and finding people who appreciate that about me rather than resent me for it. 

so the realization i have come to is the following: i. am. happy.

and i say about fuckin time.